Tears of Joy

Driving to Eugene, Oregon, on a crisp sunny fall Saturday, I was suffused with an inexplicable happy anticipation. It felt like such a gift of a special day. Only ten days earlier, I’d been accepted as a student of meditation Master Sri Chinmoy, who had flown in from New York City to give a Peace Concert that evening. Many of his students were there. Before the concert, we all met for a function. This would be my first time seeing Sri Chinmoy in person.

However, my joy soon drowned in copious tears that poured forth uncontrollably. Why, I wondered, was my happiness drenched in tears? Yet, it was strange⎯I didn’t feel any sadness. My tears quietly continued flowing. I sat to the side, assuring concerned friends I was okay. I just didn’t know why I was crying.

That evening, while Sri Chinmoy stood against the wall prior to ascending the stage to offer his concert, I caught his sweet glance—and my heart stopped. It was as if we’d known each other before. I fell to my knees inwardly, not knowing why, but ever so grateful for his unexpected glance.

Later, I learned that this is the soul’s way of expressing gratitude and love—with tears of joy.

Before I accepted
The life of aspiration,
My tears were the tears
Of real sorrow.
Now that I have accepted
The life of aspiration,
My tears are not tears of sorrow
But tears of real joy.

Sri Chinmoy 1

• 1. Ten Thousand Flower-Flames, part 52, Agni Press, 1983